Thursday, February 8, 2007

In the Name of Science

Here's another memoir--enjoy!

Conference was great! I have to admit I slept through a few talks in the p.m. sessions--chalk it up to MYCLOSeD LIDs (Mother Of Young Children Lack Of Sleep Disorder, Long, Indefinite Duration).

In other news, I think my son is practicing to become a scientist. Not long ago he conducted an experiment to discover the speed at which fluid milk poured from a nearly full gallon container if held directly perpendicular to the floor.

Hypothesis: If I pour this milk onto the floor and the distance between Mom and me is at least 10 yards, Mom's increase in velocity will be insufficient to stop me before the container completely empties.

Hypothesis correct.

For an encore experiment, he tested the strength of eggshells using 2 raw eggs. To ensure its validity, he then repeated the experiment 7 more times. You’ve got to admit, at least he's thorough. Not long after, he attempted to clear three bookshelves of books and to decrease the de-shelving time he enlisted his 1 year old lab assistant. And I can't forget his trial of peanut butter as a skin moisturizer and hair conditioner. This same child looks up at me without warning and utters things like, "I love you, Mom. You're the best mommy."

I love you too, Einstein.


Anonymous said...

How nice. Little kids can be very funny. Next he'll be throwing things out the window to see how gravity works.

Stephanie said...

OH MY GOODNESS! I am rolling! I love your writing style!!

Thanks for visiting me...I will definately be back!

compulsive writer said...

What is it about kids and that "stength of eggshells" experiment? With my kids it's only outdone by the "how long will this egg hide quietly under my bed before it smashes and stinks up the place" experiment.

Fun stuff!

(And thanks for the great idea--unless you want to do it on your blog I would love to use the Romeo and Juliet photo for a story contest. Let me know.)

Jennifer B. said...

Thanks anon. You have a point. Think I'd better lock the windows.

Stephanie -- Nice of you to visit. Thanks for your kind comments. Come back soon!

CW -- Ewww. Luckily I have escaped the egg under the bed experiment. Whew!
Please feel free to go ahead with the story contest. I would really enjoy reading everyone's contributions and maybe I'd even try it myself!

compulsive writer said...

Thanks--it was a brilliant idea!

Toni said...

GET A LOCK FOR THE TOILET! Car keys can go down there you know!

Anonymous said...

jennifer! you are cracking me up. i laughed out loud when i read the part about the hypothesis and the result especially. i am getting a kick out of your writing style.

happy day :)

c jane said...

But i am dying to know...did the peanut butter moisturize?